Labor Lensby LlaMamma

What is normal? — Stillbirth and Late Loss — Care, Choices, and Support

What's usually within range, and when to call.

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Below are common situations related to Stillbirth and Late Loss — Care, Choices, and Support. Each pairs a plain-language "usually within the range of normal" note with concrete signs to call your care team. If something feels wrong that isn't listed, call anyway.

  • Being told your baby has died

    Within the range of normal

    Numbness, disbelief, wanting a second scan, needing time before decisions — all normal reactions. Most decisions can wait hours, and some can wait days.

    Call your healthcare team if

    You need more time before proceeding, you want a second opinion or scan, or you want your support people present before another word is said — say so. Your care team can slow down.

  • During induction and birth

    Within the range of normal

    Full pain management, birth support people, quiet room, no fetal monitors on the walls — all standard requests bereavement pathways honor.

    Call your healthcare team if

    Bleeding heavier than pad-an-hour, fever, or severe headache/vision changes/upper-belly pain — the same medical warning signs apply. Tell your nurse right away.

  • Time with your baby

    Within the range of normal

    You can hold, bathe, dress, take photos, invite family — for hours or, in some hospitals, days using a CuddleCot cooling bassinet. You can also choose not to, or start and stop.

    Call your healthcare team if

    You wouldn't 'call' about this — just know your choices can change in either direction and staff should support that.

  • Physical recovery in the days after

    Within the range of normal

    Bleeding (lochia), afterpains, milk coming in around day 3–5, and hormonal drops all happen exactly as they would with a live birth.

    Call your healthcare team if

    Soaking a pad in an hour, fever ≥100.4°F, foul-smelling discharge, one-sided calf swelling, chest pain or shortness of breath, severe headache, thoughts of harming yourself — same warning signs as any postpartum recovery. Postpartum VTE risk is higher after loss.

  • Emotional wellbeing at 2 weeks, 2 months, 2 years

    Within the range of normal

    Grief after stillbirth is not linear. Anniversary dates, due dates, and later pregnancies bring waves. Both parents grieve, often differently and on different timelines.

    Call your healthcare team if

    Trouble functioning at 2+ weeks, intrusive thoughts, hopelessness, or any thought of harming yourself — call your provider, PSI (1-800-944-4773), Star Legacy, or 988 same day. Perinatal mental health specialists trained in loss exist and are worth asking for.