Appointment advocacy script builder

These are starting points based on the AHRQ SHARE approach and the BRAIN framework. Adapt them to your voice. See the full topic: Scripts for advocating in appointments.

1. What's the situation?

An unexpected recommendation was just madeA provider has recommended a procedure, medication, or change of plan that you weren't expecting.The conversation feels rushed or pressuredYou're being asked to decide quickly and it doesn't feel like there's room to breathe.I want to decline an interventionYou've heard the recommendation, and you're choosing not to proceed right now.I want to see the evidence behind a recommendationYou want to understand where a recommendation is coming from before you agree.My birth plan isn't being followedYou had preferences documented, and the care you're getting doesn't match them.I want to escalate to someone elseYou've had the conversation, it isn't working, and you need a different person in the room.I have a postpartum concern that isn't being taken seriouslyYou're describing a symptom after birth and don't feel heard.

2. What tone do you want?

Warm & collaborativeSofter phrasing, invites partnership. Good for routine visits and providers you trust.Direct & clearNeutral, matter-of-fact. Good when you want to be understood without hedging.Firm boundaryShort sentences, no softeners. Use when previous requests weren't respected.

3. Anything you want to add in your own words? (optional)

Your script

I'd love your help with this — thanks for explaining. Before we go further, I'd like to understand this decision fully.

Using BRAIN:
• Benefits — I'd love your help with this — what are the specific benefits you're hoping for in my situation?
• Risks — I'd love your help with this — what are the risks — both common and rare — and how often do they happen?
• Alternatives — I'd love your help with this — what are the alternatives, including a smaller version of this or a different approach?
• Intuition — I'd love your help with this — i want a few minutes to think this over with my partner and check in with how I'm feeling.
• Nothing — I'd love your help with this — what happens if we do nothing right now, or wait an hour and reassess?

I'd love your help with this — can you note in my chart that I've asked these questions, and let me know when you'll come back?

Educational only — this doesn't replace advice from your care team. If something feels like an emergency, call your provider or 911.

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